i could add a lot, but won’t…. all i will say is that anger is a desire-killer. treat your spouse with anger and criticism and yelling and cursing, throw in a little bullying and grabbing and some other stuff. and then get mad at her when she wants to talk about it, and about why there is no intimacy, as if she is being unreasonable.

anger kills desire.

for new parents: Husbands getting frustrated b/c things what used to feel good to your wife now causes discomfort. Oh horrors, you might have to learn a new routine (#3) newsflash …. a females body (and I mean vagina) may be permanently altered by childbirth and she doesn’t even know what will feel good or not anymore. It’s frustrating for her as well. She might be dealing with some stuff that makes her feel really unsexy (like organ prolapse… which is actually pretty common). Some understanding would really make her feel a whole lot better about herself. It’s pretty upsetting and a little scary when your whole body acts and feels different.

*If foreplay doesn’t go the way you want, bail on the whole thing and go out for a cigarette.

Demand that your spouse participate in activities she/he find offensive or uncomfortable with then tell them they are selfish if they don’t want to partake. When using this one on a wife, use plenty of guilt and add that word “submission” to your guilt trip fellas!

Point out stretch marks especially after childbirth.

Look disgusted if your man has erectile issues.

Don’t move around in bed. As a matter of fact, act like a dead fish. Showing any passion might throw off the rhythm and draw it out longer. Who wants that?

Last but not least, call your spouse by someone else’s name. Perhaps and old fling. It’s always good to liven up things.