Comments on: Build a Better Marriage by Having Sex http://www.simplemarriage.net/build-a-better-marriage-by-having-sex.html Keep it simple. Make it better. Tue, 07 Feb 2012 00:04:29 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: RadiantBeauty http://www.simplemarriage.net/build-a-better-marriage-by-having-sex.html#comment-13876 RadiantBeauty Fri, 08 Jul 2011 03:22:39 +0000 http://www.simplemarriage.net/?p=3132#comment-13876 Ok, I know that sex is a way to connect with your husband because that is how men relate. But, most of the time the only reason I'm not interested in being intimate with my husband is because he is often very inconsiderate of me. In everything he does, I always seem to come last. Like, he does everything he wants to do then I am the last thing on his "to do list". It's hurtful to be under-valued. I have tried expressing this to him and even given in and even been intimate with him while holding these feelings inside. And, it doesn't help that once we finish it's like he's running to the living room to get away from me. There is no cuddling or enjoying the moment. It feels like he rushes through sex just to get what he wants and get away from me. I do all I can to be pleasant and be a good wife (work full time, take care of him and our children etc). I don't know what else to do. I am tired of laying down my standards and expectations for a "lay in the hay", just to be ignored soon thereafter. That's just as hurtful. How can I get my husband to: a) be considerate of me and b) communicate with me? Ok, I know that sex is a way to connect with your husband because that is how men relate. But, most of the time the only reason I’m not interested in being intimate with my husband is because he is often very inconsiderate of me. In everything he does, I always seem to come last. Like, he does everything he wants to do then I am the last thing on his “to do list”. It’s hurtful to be under-valued. I have tried expressing this to him and even given in and even been intimate with him while holding these feelings inside. And, it doesn’t help that once we finish it’s like he’s running to the living room to get away from me. There is no cuddling or enjoying the moment. It feels like he rushes through sex just to get what he wants and get away from me. I do all I can to be pleasant and be a good wife (work full time, take care of him and our children etc). I don’t know what else to do.

I am tired of laying down my standards and expectations for a “lay in the hay”, just to be ignored soon thereafter. That’s just as hurtful. How can I get my husband to: a) be considerate of me and b) communicate with me?

]]> By: Steve http://www.simplemarriage.net/build-a-better-marriage-by-having-sex.html#comment-11235 Steve Sun, 16 Jan 2011 17:24:56 +0000 http://www.simplemarriage.net/?p=3132#comment-11235 We have been married for 21 years, with two girls - 16 and 11 and three dogs. Spontaneous does not work - we schedule making love every-other-day and what first helped is we enjoyed each other more in the mornings - so much so that we plan on doing this. Sex is important and we make it the first thing we do in the day - it comes before everything else. Then we discovered we liked lingerie. I select it for my wife to wear the day before and set out what I would like to see her wear, I take a shower put on some cologne and shave before bed. I love our time together and the anticipation and knowing that we will come together is enchanting - I look forward to getting up on these mornings more than anything else. I wish we simply decided to have marital relations every single morning aside from when she has her period and does not want to. The quality of making love has improved dramatically - we take it slow and enjoy every single nuance - smells, tastes, textures, visually, warmth. We have been married for 21 years, with two girls – 16 and 11 and three dogs. Spontaneous does not work – we schedule making love every-other-day and what first helped is we enjoyed each other more in the mornings – so much so that we plan on doing this. Sex is important and we make it the first thing we do in the day – it comes before everything else. Then we discovered we liked lingerie. I select it for my wife to wear the day before and set out what I would like to see her wear, I take a shower put on some cologne and shave before bed. I love our time together and the anticipation and knowing that we will come together is enchanting – I look forward to getting up on these mornings more than anything else. I wish we simply decided to have marital relations every single morning aside from when she has her period and does not want to. The quality of making love has improved dramatically – we take it slow and enjoy every single nuance – smells, tastes, textures, visually, warmth.

]]> By: DoctorPsi http://www.simplemarriage.net/build-a-better-marriage-by-having-sex.html#comment-5492 DoctorPsi Wed, 09 Dec 2009 10:50:12 +0000 http://www.simplemarriage.net/?p=3132#comment-5492 There is an old saying which in the present context is perfect: "Sex can keep the fire of a relation burning". There is probably some wisdom in that. <br>____________________________________________<br><a rel="follow" href="http://99a-z.com/article7199.html" rel="nofollow">Marriage Counselors</a> There is an old saying which in the present context is perfect: “Sex can keep the fire of a relation burning”. There is probably some wisdom in that.
____________________________________________
Marriage Counselors

]]> By: Christi http://www.simplemarriage.net/build-a-better-marriage-by-having-sex.html#comment-5203 Christi Wed, 04 Nov 2009 14:55:26 +0000 http://www.simplemarriage.net/?p=3132#comment-5203 I totally agree with everyone. I also want to put in there that you don't have to have intercourse to make love. We've had illness and other matters in our home lately so the act of talking, slowing down and just touching each other has brought us very close. Sex isn't always a priority, but being cuddled together skin to skin is a must! I totally agree with everyone. I also want to put in there that you don’t have to have intercourse to make love. We’ve had illness and other matters in our home lately so the act of talking, slowing down and just touching each other has brought us very close. Sex isn’t always a priority, but being cuddled together skin to skin is a must!

]]> By: Dustin | Engaged Marriage http://www.simplemarriage.net/build-a-better-marriage-by-having-sex.html#comment-5014 Dustin | Engaged Marriage Thu, 22 Oct 2009 03:44:08 +0000 http://www.simplemarriage.net/?p=3132#comment-5014 Here's the best way I've learned to express what sex should be in an awesome marriage: Sex is not merely an act. Sex is the most powerful and fully spiritual means of communication that God has provided to us. That's all I have to say about that. :) Here’s the best way I’ve learned to express what sex should be in an awesome marriage:

Sex is not merely an act. Sex is the most powerful and fully spiritual means of communication that God has provided to us.

That’s all I have to say about that. :)

]]> By: Corey http://www.simplemarriage.net/build-a-better-marriage-by-having-sex.html#comment-4982 Corey Mon, 19 Oct 2009 14:02:22 +0000 http://www.simplemarriage.net/?p=3132#comment-4982 Okay Melissa- Is the "written by a man" question due to the topic of the post or the shortness of the words spoken? :) Okay Melissa- Is the “written by a man” question due to the topic of the post or the shortness of the words spoken? :)

]]> By: carolina http://www.simplemarriage.net/build-a-better-marriage-by-having-sex.html#comment-4981 carolina Mon, 19 Oct 2009 13:00:07 +0000 http://www.simplemarriage.net/?p=3132#comment-4981 I think it takes a lot from both female and male. I used to expect the hubby to initiate things and for him to make it exciting. But it has nothing to do with him and everything to do with us. We both need to make an effort to be in the mood and an effort to be engaged. That makes the sex that we do have more quality driven. So even if we are busy and tired throughout the week, we have those weekend moments that we can look back to with excitement and look forward to them again. I think it takes a lot from both female and male. I used to expect the hubby to initiate things and for him to make it exciting. But it has nothing to do with him and everything to do with us. We both need to make an effort to be in the mood and an effort to be engaged. That makes the sex that we do have more quality driven. So even if we are busy and tired throughout the week, we have those weekend moments that we can look back to with excitement and look forward to them again.

]]> By: Melissa - Peace & Projects http://www.simplemarriage.net/build-a-better-marriage-by-having-sex.html#comment-4980 Melissa - Peace & Projects Sun, 18 Oct 2009 05:28:34 +0000 http://www.simplemarriage.net/?p=3132#comment-4980 Hey... is this blog written by a man?? I do agree with this post... and so does Mr. Right. Hey… is this blog written by a man??

I do agree with this post… and so does Mr. Right.

]]> By: Laurie http://www.simplemarriage.net/build-a-better-marriage-by-having-sex.html#comment-4978 Laurie Sun, 18 Oct 2009 03:54:00 +0000 http://www.simplemarriage.net/?p=3132#comment-4978 Wow Corey, you said so much with so few words. That is kind of like sex isn't it? You can say so much with just a few words but each one ends with an exclamation mark! Wow Corey, you said so much with so few words. That is kind of like sex isn’t it? You can say so much with just a few words but each one ends with an exclamation mark!

]]> By: Trish http://www.simplemarriage.net/build-a-better-marriage-by-having-sex.html#comment-4973 Trish Sat, 17 Oct 2009 11:43:29 +0000 http://www.simplemarriage.net/?p=3132#comment-4973 Great advice and just what I needed to hear ;) ...better print it off my my non internet hubby ! Great advice and just what I needed to hear ;) …better print it off my my non internet hubby !

]]>