Growing up, I spent summers with my grandmother in Brooklyn. We went shopping as I pushed her cart and talked with the shopkeepers. We watched soap operas and yelled, “liars” to the commercials. I watched her cook and she told me stories. We hung out on the fire escape and watched kids playing ball. We are well into summer now so I reached out to the 4 awesome people behind Tandem Teaching who care about education infused with curiosity to talk about kids’ experiences during the summer.
How should we be thinking about our children’s summer experiences?
TT: Summer is a great opportunity to get the chance to do novel things with your kids. Our best advice would be to focus on building memories and experiences that aren’t possible during the school year – these will strengthen and sustain them for a lifetime.
I like that idea. Can you say more?
TT: Parents are often pressured to sign their children up for things that will prepare them for the next grade. But a lot of parents don’t realize the potential inherent in the kinds of experiences you spoke about.
When you were shopping with your grandma, you were making an emotional connection. Your gram might have asked you to write the grocery list, or talked to you about comparing prices while you shopped. It didn’t feel like your gram was “teaching” and yet those are applications of skills that children are expected to have in the classroom. Cooking is also a great example. Parents can invite their children in to these moments, and kids will learn about fractions and math (not to mention cleaning up!). Kids gain confidence from learning informally with someone who loves them. What they know and how they feel about themselves will be invaluable in the classroom.
What specific “bonding experiences” can you recall from your own childhood?
My mom used to paint big signs on butcher paper and put it up on the garage whenever we would get back from a trip or to celebrate an achievement. It made us feel really loved, and it made those achievements special because it felt like the whole family was celebrating. And none of my friend’s parents did this, so it really stood out as something my mom did to make us feel really appreciated.
What do you think makes an experience “memorable”?
Something out of the ordinary. If your kiddo’s friend would think, “This family is so different!” then you’re right on track.
–If you live in the city, take walks together at night to look for wildlife. Take a camera and spot animals and birds. Make it an urban safari! Did you know that birds make nests in traffic lights?
–Plant healthy vegetables in the backyard. Watch them grow, and eat them by the time the summer’s over. Your kiddo is so much more likely to want to eat the Brussels sprouts if she spent the summer nurturing them herself.
–Give them a new experience, take them fishing. Climb trees.
Any closing thoughts?
I guess I could close with a quote from my ma, who, when pushing us to do uncomfortable things (that we later remembered fondly) would always say, “Come on, Liss! Let’s make a memory.”
(photo source)
“Liars!” That is fabulous – she was teaching you to not get caught in the consumer trap! I love it!
My mom and I spent one summer watching Stephano and Marlena on Days of Our Lives, but I think that was also the summer we caved in and bought a food dehydrator we saw on an infomercial.
This was heartwarming
Thank you!
It’s hard not to make the summer just as crazy and scheduled as the school year. We’ve tried to pull back and have plenty of time to just hang out, but it’s hard! One thing that I love about our summers is the ritual of returning to the same place year after year with my husband’s family. The kids have developed their own routines and games that grow and change as they get older, but the core remains. That’s what our summer memories are made of!
I love that! Let’s make a memory! I, too, spent summers with my grandma and they centered on shopping, watching soap operas, cooking, and gardening. To this day, I associate all of those things (especially listening to The Guiding Light on the radio!) with her.
My grandmother got me hooked on “As the World Turns” but the whole idea of making memories certainly rings true and makes so much sense. We also go to the same place in VT every year and there are layers upon layers of memories for all of us throughout the years.
What a lovely post. Childhood memory: We would drive to the swimming pool on summer days, but what I remember isn’t what happened in the pool, so much as the drive over — when Mom would make up songs based on the things we passed, and my little sister would gasp “Goggies! Goggies!” whenever we drove by pastures of grazing cows. (In the suburbs!) She was so transported with excitement that all of us would keep an eye out so we could shout “Goggies! Goggies!”
I just love the idea of mindfully making good memories. I don’t have kids, but I’m appropriating that for myself with what is left of this summer. (And yes, there is plenty, right?) I look forward to making memories of the sky at dusk over my favorite city park. And the sound of kids running through the fountain. And eating juicy watermelon. I just finished making some lovely memories on a little roadtrip to meet an internet friend in Canada. She invited me to come up and go to a Leonard Cohen exhibit at her local museum. The exhibit was great. And so is the memory of my little 3-day excursion.
I don’t have kids yet, but this was a great reminder to stop complaining about the summer heat and remember what made summers so great for me as a kid. Things like swimming, reading for hours, and savoring frozen treats.
This is the first summer I’ve had to work while the boys have been at school so the four days a week we’re at home have been lovely lazy days. No planning at all. Luckily, I have had the neighbor kids saying we’re different and they want to do what we do, so hopefully that means we’re still on track.
I concur with your advice to make memories. We have found memories don’t cost much either. Whether the kids are making forts out of couch cushions, playing board games, or helping make a fabulous dessert, there are many low cost memory-making ideas. Each year we take the kids to visit friends and go geode hunting–searching for geodes along the banks of a river we wade down with buckets. Then we carry our heavy treasures down and out of the river and break and open later. Last summer this experience beat Disney World in their eyes.