Blog Action Day 2008- Poverty

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Today Simple Marriages is joining over 8,000 other bloggers and websites for Blog Action Day 2008!

The topic: Poverty. For some great resources or more information, check out Learn About Poverty.

If you’re fortunate enough to be living in an industrialized country, poverty may mean you live below a certain level of income and must be creative in order to make ends meet. Outside these countries, poverty means the difference between eating one day or not, living another day or not. It’s a problem all of us should be more aware of and working towards a solution.

So how does simplifying marriage tie into alleviating poverty? Make it a family maxim. Read more »

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Your Parents Are Coming To Visit For How Long? 8 Tips For Improving Your Relationship With In-Laws

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When you asked your spouse to marry you, or when you said yes to the question, did you fully comprehend what you were saying at the time?

You were planning out the rest of your life at the moment and inviting another person to join you in the journey. But did you realize who they’d be bringing along with them on this journey to wedded bliss and harmony?

Handling in-laws can be tricky for most every couple. Let’s face it, you are an outsider to a family system that has very established rules and dynamics. But to be fair, your spouse has the same battle with your family.

Not everyone has the blessing of good in-laws. Many spouses still may feel like they must compete against their in-laws for the time and attention of their spouse. This is especially true during the first few years of marriage.

In my case, I’ve been blessed with great in-laws. But this didn’t just happen by chance. They had to learn this skill, as did I.

I am grateful to my brother in-law and sister in-laws for the breaking in of my in-laws. You see, my wife is the youngest of 5 in her family. So her parents were already pretty experienced in the in-law world by the time I entered the picture.

But I did marry their baby, so even with all their experience, it took some adjusting for all of us to grow to where we are today.

Like it or not, the in-laws are part of your life. So having a good relationship with them is vital. Read more »

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11 Timeless Lessons To Teach Your Children About Money

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Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. ~Proverbs 22:6

Editors note: This post is not necessarily about marriage, but it is about family. So it all ties together.

Now that I have children of my own, I am learning more about the importance of money and the lessons I’ve learned the hard way in this area. There are many habits I wish I would’ve learned long ago.

Growing up in my household, money was one of the subjects that was secretive and silent. The cost of things were hidden from others and any time a conversation needed to be had about money, the mood was often tense and defensive.

Because of this, I plan on teaching my kids about money. How to talk about it, handle it, plus some skills and habits that will help get them off to a good start.

Most importantly, I hope to have them learn by doing and from my wife and I’s example.

There are some basic principles to follow when it comes to money. Read more »

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The Lazy Marriage’s Budget

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Photo courtesy auntsmack4u

I married a CPA. At the risk of offending the CPA society, your brains are just wired differently than the rest of us. That is definitely the case with my wife.

I consider myself to be fairly good with numbers, and I did well in Math back in school, but I’m not in the league of the CPA. Although I do find great pleasure when my checkbook balances and hers is off a few cents. She returns the joy by poking fun at how long it takes me to complete the 1 star Sudoku puzzle.

For the life of our marriage, she preferred to live within a budget. For the beginning years of our marriage I would enter the discussions kicking and screaming. I always felt a budget was far too limiting. I didn’t want to cramp my style.

Needless to say, my attitude helped get us in a financial hole.

The two most common topics fought over in marriage are money and sex. I’ve written plenty of times on the sex topic, now it’s time to tackle the money.

When it comes to budgeting, there are those that live by one and those of us that swear tomorrow we are going to sit down and write one out. The intention is honest, we just have trouble following through.

So how do you set up a budget you’ll actually follow? Read more »

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Man Up: Quit Coddling Your Kids

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This is a recent post from Brett McKay of Art of Manliness that is too good not to share.

I look around at young people these days, and I honestly fear for the future of my country. People are becoming less and less resilient and more and more clueless on how to survive in the real world. We live in a society of namby pamby men and women who whine when they don’t get what they want and think they are entitled to all the comforts the world has to offer. What do I blame it on? Bad parenting.

Baby Boomer parents developed a parenting philosophy that was soft on discipline and heavy on spoiling their children. Because many Boomer couples were both working, they wanted to make sure their children liked them to make up for the lack of time they were spending with their children. Generation X parents are even worse about coddling their kids. To many many Gen X parents, children are just an accessory you get to dress up with ironic t-shirts and fauxhawks.

In an effort to stop the wussification of yet another generation of children, here are six ways young fathers can raise strong, resilient, and independent children. Read more »

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The Power of a Family Maxim

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I can do everything through Him who gives me strength. ~ Philippians 4:13

In the thirteenth century a man named William Wallace became the instrument of freedom from England’s tyranny over Scotland. A very wicked king ruled England. A tragedy in the life of William Wallace launched him into living for this cause. Initially his cause was revenge, but soon his cause turned to something bigger than himself – freedom for a nation. When he challenged the commoners to fight for this freedom, they responded that the enemy was too great and that they might die on the battlefield. They also refused to fight for the nobles, the knights and leaders who had a vested interest in gaining more land for themselves versus a pure cause of freedom. Wallace’s response: “Yes, we might die. We will all die sooner or later. But we will die for a cause worth dying for. So that our children and their children might live in freedom.” This story was popularized in the movie Brave Heart (Sherman Oaks, California: Paramount Pictures, 1995).

Today we find many Christian believers living a status quo relationship with God that is more characterized as “business as usual” than a life demonstrating God’s power. Our focus is often more concerned with improving our standard of living than improving the Kingdom of God through our circle of influence. God has called each of us to live for a cause greater than ourselves – a life that is dependent on His grace and power to achieve things we never thought possible through our lives. This is His plan for your life.

The apostle Paul prayed that He might experience the power of the resurrection in his life. This power is available to you and me to live for a cause greater than ourselves. Read more »

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Parenting 101 According to American Idol

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Photo courtesy Txallekat

It seemed like a typical beginning to a Monday morning for the rest of us, for them, it was a chance of a lifetime. As the sun peaked over the horizon and simply yawned itself awake, to them it was as if it was exploding onto the scene proclaiming their lives changed. While most of us were robotically driving southbound surrounded by a herd of metal, chrome, and rubber, they were gathering, nearly 100,000 strong at Texas Stadium, praying for their chance to be the next American Idol!

Now, I must admit to you (and only you, please do not tell anyone else) that I am a big fan of the show. Please do not hold it against me, but it is true. To see normal people, like the busboy from Luby’s, make it big, is somewhat inspiring. But I must confess I do not watch so much for the winners as I do for the losers. I am absolutely intrigued by what possesses bad singers to go on national TV, belt out a song that makes my dog cringe only to be ridiculed by the judges and to be the source of laughter around millions of coffee pots the next morning.

It’s the “American Idol Phenomenon.” Read more »

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How to keep a simple home with kids (Plus: Here’s to Bavarian sugar cookies)

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The following is contributed from Leo Babauta. Leo and his wife have six children and his other work can be found at zenhabits.net.

Any parent knows that kids create clutter like nobody’s business.

It’s enough to drive a simplifier such as myself crazy. Still, with a little diligence, and a little bit of Zen detachment, it’s possible to have a simple, (relatively) uncluttered home as well as peace of mind.

Let me first state the obvious: any life that includes children is going to be complicated, at least to some degree. You’ll never get an absolute minimalist lifestyle with kids, and I’ve learned to accept that. While my minimalist inner self would like to live without a car, a cell phone, or a large house, my kids preclude those things from happening.

However, I have found ways to simplify my house, including the kids’ rooms. Sure, the house still gets messy – especially their rooms. But it’s not as bad as it once was, and it’s at a manageable level.

Here are my tips for simplifying your home with kids: Read more »

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