How to Create a Passionate Marriage in the Shower

Photo courtesy pettervanallen

Before your mind jumps to anything steamy or suggestive, read the entire post.

If your marriage is anything like mine, there are times when passion and creativity wane. My wife and I will be celebrating our 15th anniversary next month. While most of the 15 years have been really good to great, there are times when we would have benefited from a kick in the passionate butt.

There have been many things written and created in the shower. For some people, this is where their best ideas are generated. Maybe it’s because it’s relaxing. Or because if you sing, you sound great. Regardless the reason, the shower could provide a spark of passion for your marriage.

Here are a few ideas how to turn the shower into a marriage energy boost. Feel free to add to this list in the comments below.

1. Pray. Spend time praying for your marriage. For your spouse. If prayer is not something you do, try meditating. Focus on your role in the marriage.
2. Declutter and organize your day. While you have some time between the process of lather, rinse, repeat, think through your schedule for the day. Organize your priorities. Eliminate the nonessential tasks in order to free up time with your spouse.
3. Create a list of everything you love about your spouse. There are many times in marriage where the negative tends to dominate the positive. It is inevitable that when you live with someone else, they will get on your nerves. It is important to take time to focus on the things you love about your spouse. Make a mental list of the things you love about your spouse. During your next shower, try to add more to the list. It will help if you write it down, but wait until you’re out of the shower.
4. Write a poem or song. Since the shower is usually a place of creativity, turn the mental editor off and write a poem or love song. For some people, this will come easily. For others this would be like scaling Mt. Everest. Try it. See if you can be the next great romantic.
5. Plan a date or weekend away. This one is pretty much self explanatory. Stretch your thinking to come up with a creative date night. Many years ago, I planned some theme dates. Childish: we ate a Chuck E. Cheese (before we had kids), then went to a park to swing and slide. Western: we ate country food then went horseback riding. Have fun with this. See if you can totally surprise your spouse. In this morning’s shower, I planned a surprise weekend away in the Caribbean. Oops, surprise honey!
6. Groom yourself to look good for your spouse. This may come as no surprise, but the shower is usually where you go to get clean. Spend some time making yourself presentable for your spouse. My wife likes me to have a stubble free face, I like to have a few days growth, mainly because I’m lazy. Spend some time grooming. Your spouse will notice.
7. Write a note to your spouse while they’re showering. This idea comes from one of my readers. When your spouse is in the shower, sneak in and write them a little note on the mirror. You can use the fog on the mirror or a dry erase marker. Great idea.
8. Shower together. Wash each other. Take your time. Then do what comes naturally.

ABOUT THE WRITER

Corey is the editor of Simple Marriage as well as a licensed marriage & family therapist. While he has a Ph.D. in Family Therapy, he only occasionally likes to be called doctor. If you enjoyed this post, please subscribe so you don't miss any future posts.