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How to Create a Passionate Marriage in the Shower

by Corey on April 21, 2008 · 5 comments

shower How to Create a Passionate Marriage in the Shower
Photo courtesy pettervanallen

Before your mind jumps to anything steamy or suggestive, read the entire post.

If your marriage is anything like mine, there are times when passion and creativity wane. My wife and I will be celebrating our 15th anniversary next month. While most of the 15 years have been really good to great, there are times when we would have benefited from a kick in the passionate butt.

There have been many things written and created in the shower. For some people, this is where their best ideas are generated. Maybe it’s because it’s relaxing. Or because if you sing, you sound great. Regardless the reason, the shower could provide a spark of passion for your marriage.

Here are a few ideas how to turn the shower into a marriage energy boost. Feel free to add to this list in the comments below.

  1. Pray. Spend time praying for your marriage. For your spouse. If prayer is not something you do, try meditating. Focus on your role in the marriage.
  2. Declutter and organize your day. While you have some time between the process of lather, rinse, repeat, think through your schedule for the day. Organize your priorities. Eliminate the nonessential tasks in order to free up time with your spouse.
  3. Create a list of everything you love about your spouse. There are many times in marriage where the negative tends to dominate the positive. It is inevitable that when you live with someone else, they will get on your nerves. It is important to take time to focus on the things you love about your spouse. Make a mental list of the things you love about your spouse. During your next shower, try to add more to the list. It will help if you write it down, but wait until you’re out of the shower.
  4. Write a poem or song. Since the shower is usually a place of creativity, turn the mental editor off and write a poem or love song. For some people, this will come easily. For others this would be like scaling Mt. Everest. Try it. See if you can be the next great romantic.
  5. Plan a date or weekend away. This one is pretty much self explanatory. Stretch your thinking to come up with a creative date night. Many years ago, I planned some theme dates. Childish: we ate a Chuck E. Cheese (before we had kids), then went to a park to swing and slide. Western: we ate country food then went horseback riding. Have fun with this. See if you can totally surprise your spouse. In this morning’s shower, I planned a surprise weekend away in the Caribbean. Oops, surprise honey!
  6. Groom yourself to look good for your spouse. This may come as no surprise, but the shower is usually where you go to get clean. Spend some time making yourself presentable for your spouse. My wife likes me to have a stubble free face, I like to have a few days growth, mainly because I’m lazy. Spend some time grooming. Your spouse will notice.
  7. Write a note to your spouse while they’re showering. This idea comes from one of my readers. When your spouse is in the shower, sneak in and write them a little note on the mirror. You can use the fog on the mirror or a dry erase marker. Great idea.
  8. Shower together. Wash each other. Take your time. Then do what comes naturally.

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{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }

Laurie April 21, 2008 at 9:44 pm

Great ideas Corey. Our shower has been out of commission for a while now but we have an over sized tub. I do a lot of praying in the tub. I’ll have to use the time for some of your other suggestions as well.

An over sized tub is perfect for two. Bubbles are also a great addition as well. he he he.

Stubble hey? I would have never noticed!

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Corey April 23, 2008 at 10:09 am

Bubbles are great. So are candles and good music.

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Kathy @ Parent Talk Today April 25, 2008 at 6:44 pm

Corey, these are great! I need the inspiration, too, as Randy and I will be celebrating 15 years in August. Gotta keep things fresh!

I’m planning a post over at Parent Talk Today on this topic, and I’ll include a link to your post. Happy to send my readers over here for such a great bunch of suggestions! Thanks again.

Kathy

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David March 8, 2009 at 4:45 pm

Quote: ‘Pray. Spend time praying for your marriage. For your spouse.’

Isn’t that another way of saying roll the dice and hope that your ‘invisible friend’ will do all the work for you?
Take resposibility. It’s down to YOU and no one else!

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Corey March 8, 2009 at 5:56 pm

@David- I’m going to disagree with you on this one. The idea of praying for your marriage and your spouse is not about God doing the work for you, it’s about perspective and the role God plays in my life. I still must do the work, agreed, but my relationship with God spurs me to be a better husband, father, and person.

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