Marriage Lessons from MC Hammer

Now I know you’ve had the same experience as I have. You’re driving alone in your car, an MC Hammer song comes on the radio, what do you do?

You turn it up and sing along, of course!

This happened the other day and it got me thinking about his journey from humble beginnings, to fame, then to bankruptcy. After doing a bit of investigating into his story, Hammer’s story can actually teach us a lot about marriage and life. As his career rose and his fame grew, a backlash started regarding the repetitive nature of his lyrics and his apparent over-reliance on sampling other artist’s hooks as his own.

And probably most notably (other than Hammer pants), MC Hammer’s mismanagement of his money placed him among celebrity lore.

So what can us married folk learn from his journey?

First, how many times have you experienced some good things in marriage only for them to turn repetitive and monotonous? It is so easy for life to become routine. This is largely due to the comfort zone world we each like to live within. Human nature seems to make us creatures of habit. Even if these habits are “bad.” Most of us will choose unhappiness over uncertainty. Because of an unwillingness for discomfort, routine sets in. To combat this, try spicing things up. Speak up. Break out of the routine and try something new.

Second, how often do other people’s marriages look better than our own? Granted there are actually people that are in the midst of better marriages than our own, but this is often the exception rather than the norm. Many times people will mimic what they perceive others are doing, or not doing, in order to improve their own situation. The problem with this; usually what is imitated is not solid enough to be duplicated because it was created from an impersonation itself.

To overcome this, create your own marriage. What dreams do you have for your life? For your marriage? For your children?

And third, Hammer’s mismanagement of his fortune is much like what we do, although not necessarily with money. We mismanage the good things we’ve created and acquired between one another. We often get anxious when we experience too much of a good thing. We focus too much on “waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

So oddly enough, when things are going really well between our spouse and us, we mess it up. We sabotage our own pleasure, and theirs. Could it be that we don’t know how to handle blessings in life? This may be related to the idea that I’d rather have unhappiness over uncertainty. We believe that our relationship is like the speedometer on a car. It can only travel so fast. Go so far. Like there is a ceiling to what we can handle.

What if a marriage could be more? What if it could travel beyond what we ever thought possible?

I believe marriages can be more. There is no ceiling to the potential of any relationship. And this answer is found largely in how we view what goes on between us. When we see things differently, we get the chance to get more out of what we currently have.

Photo courtesy no-frills marilyn

ABOUT THE WRITER

Corey is the editor of Simple Marriage as well as a licensed marriage & family therapist. While he has a Ph.D. in Family Therapy, he only occasionally likes to be called doctor. If you enjoyed this post, please subscribe so you don't miss any future posts.