Comments on: Taking Your Shape: Me Versus We

By: Complaining â€“ the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly | Simple Marriage

Complaining â€“ the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly | Simple Marriage — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 17:04:55 +0000

[...] So what can you know, observe and predict will happen when you get serious about the Power of One â€“ about responding to the challenges in your relationships as a clarion call to take your shape, take on yourself, and become the best you that you can be? [...]

By: Taking your shape: Focusing on the how instead of the what | The Simple Marriage Project

Mon, 24 Nov 2008 15:13:36 +0000

[...] parts one and two of the series if you missed [...]

By: Taking Your Shape: Keeping Your Cool | The Simple Marriage Project

Taking Your Shape: Keeping Your Cool | The Simple Marriage Project — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 04:27:52 +0000

[...] week we discussed differentiation levels in relationship. Since marriage is a people growing machine, your differentiation level will increase as you grow [...]

By: Tanya

Tanya — Thu, 13 Nov 2008 01:45:18 +0000

I am loving this blog more and more. This is a very interesting entry. Makes me feel somewhat ‘normal’ with what we all go through in our relationships. I just stumbled upon this last week and so far everything I read is so spot on. Thank you!!

By: Saying Thanks 11/12 â€“ and Marriage Counciling | Run For Pizza

Saying Thanks 11/12 â€“ and Marriage Counciling | Run For Pizza — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 20:28:15 +0000

[...] post at the Simple Marriage Project was another good one.Â I very much related to not wanting to [...]

By: Pace

Pace — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 17:16:06 +0000

Corey,

This is really good stuff! Thank you!

I’ve learned a lot of this material from the school of hard knocks rather than a school of psychology. It’s good to see it from a new perspective. The concept of differentiation seems very similar to what we call “holding healthy boundaries.”

By: V. Higgins

V. Higgins — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 16:29:18 +0000

Very good post. I’m in the middle, my parents are quite low differentation and growing up in that was somewhat difficult. But my DH is a wonderful man who is very patient and willing to learn, so we’ve both been figuring out this marriage thing (newlyweds, dated for almost 4 years before the wedding). One thing I love that you picked out was the purpose of marriage. We married because we believed that we’re better people because the other person is in our life. That does not necessarily mean that we’re always happy, it means a lot of communication, humility and apologies. But it’s completely worth every bit of hard work and bruised pride.

By: Jennifer (Danifer)

Jennifer (Danifer) — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 15:33:49 +0000

This really resonated with me. I think I am more on the Lower end. I had trouble finding a balance with marriage. A lot had to do with marrying at 18 and trying to grow up (and in the same direction) with someone. I always gave way too much of myself and did not learn how to take care of me. This left me insecure and resentful. Unfortunately, after 14 years of marriage and two kids, I could not do it any longer. Now, five years out of that relationship and 4 years into another, I am working at keeping that balance and we are trying to learn to communicate (and not just have confrontations). Thanks for this information. I plan to pass it along to my fiance.

By: Laurie

Laurie — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 22:07:08 +0000

Great post. Sounds like we’re going to really be doing a lot of reflecting on ourselves in your upcoming posts Corey. Thanks for this series that can grow us up even more.

Where am I with differentiation? Well, I’m not all duct taped but still sticky from pulling it off. I need to get the sticky off.

You are so right when you said we want to know what’s inside the hub but want to change what it is. I want that. I want the hub to open up more but it is usually very negative. Do you think people are really that negative inside or is it more of a defense mechanism? He wasn’t that way when we dated.

By: Shula Jackson

Shula Jackson — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 21:28:21 +0000

Great way to sum up this important information.