Photo courtesy BrockLi
If you’ve been married for more than a year, you’ve probably fallen victim to the routine of relationship. As you head into the weekend, here’s an old story to help you look at the state of things in your marriage and your life.
Feel free to leave your reaction in the comments below.
Start with a cage containing five monkeys…Inside the cage, hang a banana on a string and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the other monkeys with cold water. After a while, another monkey makes an attempt with the same result – all the other monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Pretty soon, when
another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will try to prevent it.
Now, put away the cold water. Remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and wants to climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all
of the other monkeys attack him. After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted.
Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm! Likewise, replace a third original monkey with a new one, then a fourth, then the fifth.
Every time the newest monkey takes to the stairs, he is attacked. Most of the monkeys that are beating him have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs or why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey.
After replacing all the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys have ever been sprayed with cold water. Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approaches the stairs to try for the banana.
Why not?
Because as far as they know that’s the way it’s always been done around here.
Do the monkeys ever figure out what they need to do in order to get taken out of the madhouse?
so that”s what happened to golf on Saturday mornings…
No more monkeys jumping on the bed.
Oh man, this post made me belly laugh. Thanks for that.
More than marriage, this seems like a better analogy for the workplace. (“That’s the way it’s always been done!”)
@Still Life In B.A.- This is actually a story intended for business life. But it also applies to marriage. It is so easy to fall into the that’s the way it always is in relationships as well.
How many times do we do things because it was what our folks did? Corey, you aught to tell them the story about the pot roast. Remember?
So what do you all do just because that is the way your family has always done it?
I think about holiday traditions I would like to shed.
As a teacher I have seen this first hand. There used to be a water fountain outside of my classroom where they found a frog once. The first graders came up with the idea that they should not drink from the fountain because the frog had pee’d in it.
Five year later after those first graders had long left the building. The new batch of first graders would still not drink from the fountain because a frog had pee’d in it.
I think we may have removed that fountain eventually!
That might be the scariest thing I have ever heard. Politics comes to mind. Racism, sexism and gender issues come to mind. Oh yeah, the workplace too.
That is the most depressing story I’ve ever read!
Interesting story. I think that probably about 80% of what we do every day is done a certain way because “that’s the way it’s always been done”. It’s tough sometimes to stop and really think about why you’re doing something. The usual way isn’t necessarily the best or the right way.
@hushedser- I think I would put it well above 80%!